Dancing with myself

I should do it as an urgent matter, to release my bitchy/bitter-ness.

Riding the beast

Esa Annie Pomme Frite es una mujer con suerte! Seguramente ha hecho cosas buenas en esta vida.

Es ahora ella quien monta a la bestia... Ese increíble descapotable rojo, ¡Qué envidia!

Good for you Darling!  Joder!

Descapotable rojo = the capoeira beast.

Forever

You will be the one that knows me more than I know me...forever. All my terrible flaws, insecurities, and private practices, but you are not the one that made me remind myself about any of my virtues, i am not even sure if you think i have them at all.

Afraid

My ego is afraid to ask for it; it might feel rejected.

revenge

Someday I will pay you back.   

left and right

He turned away his face in public. She turned away her lips in private.

comfort zone

When it comes to  self image,  I don't believe there is a woman and man in the world that isn't bothered by some part of their body.  Personally, I have never considered me a person with low self-steem, of course I would like to straighten my teeth, get rid of my first wrinkles and have a pair of toned legs...  But the truth is that as long as I am comfortable, there is no problem, or at least that is what I used to say. 

Now it bothers me.  Suddenly I realized that clothes didn't fit, I look bigger in pictures and that I wasn't looking "good" anymore.   Which makes me remind my superficial "ex", telling me that in order for him to like me,  I couldn't gain anymore pounds, and this memory can only be use to motivate myself.

I want to feel comfortable with myself again, exercise and get back to the weight I was before beginning past Christmas Eve.


I am so excited to change my habits.

the red thread

Yesterday, this person i haven't had communication for months came into my mind. I was wondering  who would his new victims be.   30 minutes after that thought,  I received a message from him.

 Later that day I found out that his green eye lovely pink doctor is out of town; he was bored wanting to entertain himself.

I did not reply.

THEM sus amis

I can't pretend it doesn't desmotivate me, everytime I have to see them, that intentional scruffy and untidy look.  Call me superficial but looking at them, makes me want to ignore them, besides their conversations are all about themselves, and honestly, I´m  not interested on getting to know them.

Oh "them" you!  

past

Me da gusto saber que la gente que he dejado de ver y que fue importante para mí, es feliz.

pink bubble gum

I am not 18, but I feel like Melinda from the "Hot Diana" song... Sad.

50%

Everytime that thought hits my mind, I get:
1/3 upset
1/3 sad
1/3 desperate. 

What am I going to do if I know how I am?

is not clear enough

was ist das?

is that for mich?

is that for sie?

ist das fur them? 

What? what? was? 

question mark

I guess life can't be that perfect, and I  am not sure what I prefer best... The truth is that  I know me and my tendencies, and it scares me a little, after all is in my genes.

in sickness and in health

I feel lucky  to have someone I love, caring for me, checking my temperature when I have a fever and reducing the pain and discomfort in any possible way.

I would do the same for him.

paranoia

Hoy no me pude aguantar las ganas de ir a comprarme una nieve de chocolate antes de llegar a casa.  Legué muy feliz a escoger mi nieve y mientras pagaba, el cajero comenzó a preguntarme:

¿Vives por aquì?
-no
¿Trabajas cerca?
-¿Por què, te parezco conocida?
Sí,  ¿Dónde trabajas?
- en-----.
¿Qué es eso? ¿Dónde está?
- es------.
¿Qué haces ahí? 
-nada fuera de lo normal, gracias, con permiso.

Y así me marché con delirio de persecución.  Tal vez el cajero sólo intentó ser amigable, pero con tantas cosas feas que están sucediendo en nuestro pueblito, es mejor no dar detalles.

senses

I am  a very animalistic person, my senses dominate my being instead of my head, I feel before I think.  I get disrupted and cautious every time I hear low frecuency sounds, and one of my guilty pleasures is the amazing smell of his skin, his neck.

but what then

sometimes I just want it with all my heart.

mobbing

A veces está la hoja de papel limpia, y tienes inmensas ganas de expresarte, pero una  vez con el lápiz en mano, son tantas emociones que prefieres dimitir.

Se me ha hecho comùn salir tarde del trabajo y comienzo a darle la razón a mi jefe, que no es por mi carga de trabajo, sino mi falta de eficiencia, sin embargo sé que puedo hacer para remediarlo... aprender mil  fórmulas de Excel  y "shortcuts" para hacer lo que hago minuciosamente, rápido.

Este viernes me quedaré sin jefe y sé que me sentiré desprotegida, especialmente en estos momentos en el que estoy lidiando con una persona que intenta someterme a su voluntad, ¡profesionalmente hablando claro! Creo que es tiempo de retomar "Las 48 leyes del Poder", y sacar las uñas de manera decente.

Vuelvo a salir de mi zona de confort.

totally

Hombre lobo en Paris

Él no es de este mundo, pero decidió venir a cambiarlo. Él se pierde entre sus libros por minutos a días, prefiere leer a dormir, por eso es como un extraterrestre, parece ajeno a la tierra. La masa de su cerebro se expande en diferentes dimensiones y  a ese ritmo quien sabe cuando se detenga.

Si alguien lo viera a distancia jamás sospecharía de su grandeza, aunque yo dudaría de ese extraño color de ojos, un azul líquido tan claro y puro, tan transparente pero imposible de descifrar. Sabe cuando y de quien ocultarlo y también el mejor momento para compartir sus secretos e historias de vida.

Es el hombre con corazón de niño, rebelde e incorruptible, sonriente, espontáneo y dulce, pero lo esconde bien con el humo que lo cubre al caminar, así como el vello que cubre la mayor parte de su cuerpo. En él  guarda el aroma de loción y tabaco.

Para mí es extranjero, nunca se cansa y siempre tiene algo que decir y enseñar. A veces calla y parecería mudo o molesto para quien no lo conoce. La realidad es que nunca deja de planear, él es artista de la estrategia, es hijo de lo etéreo... El extraterrestre que fala Português.

my comfort

Good thing that my friend Rosie is always there for me. I lover her!

not allowed

De pronto me acordé de la nieve de chispitas de chocolate en el congelador, los tacos de frijoles, los días de champurrado, el sofá ruidoso, la sala amplía, la medicina y la terapia, tu mamá siempre en la cocina, las múltiples invitaciones a la iglesia, el perro y su amiguito vago... Libros, libros por doquier!

little things that mean so much

She asked him to proof his love; he bought her a toothbrush.

He is a quiet man in regards of talking about feelings.  He shows his affection by acts not words, and even though, women always want to hear cheesy things, this time is not necessary. He does the best things for me, like cooking for both, caressing my hair, helping me by opening the door, putting my jacket on, and so much more.

 You probably don't know but I tend to brush my teeth about 5 times a day, my boss says I'm a maniac and that my poor enamel will perish some day.  I always carry a toothbrush with me, and the days that I forget it at home, it makes me feel so unconfortable knowing that my teeth are not clean. So one day I went to the store and bought 2 new toothbrushes, one for work and one for his place to keep it there, but once I arrived I thought: "how weird of leaving my personal stuff in his place, I don't want to be so invasive", so I didn't leave it.

Yesterday, he told me, "oh wait! I got this for you, so you don't have to worry about having one in your purse." I almost flipped. He made my day so much!!!!!!

no more playing

This time I will not risk it!